Friday, 16 November 2018

The Publicity Stunts - Episode 41

Paul’s never embraced the culture of afternoon drinking, but sharing a house with the likes of the local vicar and Gaynor, it’s far too easy to join them for one quick scoop at lunchtime and for the rest of the day to resemble the final hour of the freshers ball at the local Polytechnic. Today’s been such a day, ‘I’ve time for one drink’ he says, ‘I’ve loads to do, so I can’t stay.’ ‘Whatever...’ replies Gaynor, briefly smiling before returning to her conversation with Pixie Lott, about Pixie’s recent split with farm boy Xavier. The rest of the afternoon becomes a series of news swapping conversations, piss takes and even the odd round of darts, all lubricated with a mixture of intoxicating liquors, that seem to appear gratis from nowhere. A couple of hours later, Paul’s in bed, surveying the ceiling after a good kip and wondering what time it is. In the gloom his eyes make out the unmistakable figure of old Mrs Dixon, the fishmonger, struggling to put on her boob tube and support stockings. 'Shit, not again’ he thinks.