Monday, 12 November 2018

The Publicity Stunts - Episode 37

Pixie Lott has fallen out with her manager and she’s looking for fresh representation. "Gaynor init’ smiles Pixie, ‘like you’ve been in the business for an age like, can you be my new manager init?’ ‘Yeh’ replies Gaynor lighting a Park Drive with a new found swagger, ‘I think the going rate for a manager is 50% of all earnings including merchandise, that ok?’ They shake hands and off they pop eagerly chatting about their new roles. The next day, Gaynor announces to everyone that she’s got Pixie’s first gig at ‘The Palace’ this coming Friday. ‘Wow like!’ exclaims Pixie, ‘but init a bit short notice like, the Palace Theatre is massive like, how can we sell all those tickets in a week init?’ ‘It’s the Palace Tandoori kidda’ smiles Gaynor, finishing a bottle of Thunderbird Wine, ‘two 45 minute sets for £80 and all the leftover Tikka Masala you can eat. The second set after the pubs shut is a right laugh’ she continues, ‘some of punters get a bit frisky, but they soon get the message’, she rubs her knuckles with a fond memory of a recent punch up. ‘So the curry house next door to old Mrs Dixon’s fish shop?’ questions Pixie looking a little crestfallen. ‘I’m available, if Pixie’s busy!’ jumps in Ed Sheeran, quick as a flash.