Friday, 15 June 2018

The Locar Vicar - Episode 59

Paul’s toupee has always been a sensitive subject, the poor soul lost the majority of his hair at an early age and he’s attempted to disguise his baldness ever since. On a number of occasions, Gaynor has suggested to Paul ‘Shave it all off, that’s what all the cool guys do.’ Paul just laughs in response, ‘Fancy that’ he says ‘imagine the shock old Mrs Dixon at the fish shop would have, she always comments what a fine head of hair I have’ he adds with pride. Gaynor stares at him in amazement........’She’s taking the piss Paul, didn’t you realise?’ she laughs ‘everyone knows about your syrup, just like everyone knew about Frank Sinatra’s rug.’ ‘Frank Sinatra worn a toupee???!’ exclaims Paul in disbelief, ‘Really Gaynor, you do have some funny ideas.’ ‘I thought you worn it for a laugh’ says Ed Sheeran, whose sat trying to tune his guitar, ‘like Morrissey and his hearing aids.’ ‘Morrissey’s not deaf???!’ says Paul now almost shouting ‘then tell me’ he asks rhetorically ‘why does he sing like that!’