Friday, 11 May 2018

The Local Vicar - Episode 43

Gaynor often receives fan mail, mostly from men expressing their undying love and occasionally there’s a girly email too, celebrating her fab fashion sense. Her most regular correspondent is Hughie, he signs off his missives as ‘The chairman of the Gaynor Fan Club.’ He’ll often write three or four times a week and sometimes he’ll send a small gift through the post, such as a home made badge with Gaynor’s face on it, surrounded by glittery love hearts, stars and kisses and a safety pin sellotaped to the back. Obviously Gaynor never replies, though she enjoys letting the local vicar read the mail aloud and add his own commentary, whilst she enjoys her breakfast of Pop Tarts and Park Drive. The vicar often wears Hughie’s badges on his anorak and he’s defaced a couple of them so Gaynor has a handlebar moustache or a swastika tattoo on her forehead. She doesn’t mind and they joke what Hughie might do if he saw his artwork and muse defiled in such a manner. One day Hughie sends a picture of himself, so Gaynor’s able to recognise him at gigs. ‘He looks like David Attenborough’ laughs the vicar out loud. ‘He can look like Mussolini’s bloodhound if he’s buying the ale’ replies Gaynor.